Of course! However, theyre all done in the spirit of fun. You can't live your life for other people. 23/02/2023. Clairee Belcher, Steel Magnolias, 25. "If you are not yelling at your kids, you are not spending enough time with them.Reese Witherspoon, 86. "Would I rather be feared or loved? You must learn from the mistakes of others. People don't give them enough credit for how entertaining they are. Wow, our selection of funny sayings got a little philosophical. when you're worried, nobody feels your pain. Most of the time. It was either funny or not. "Joan Rivers, 44. Samuel L. Jackson, 63. I really miss it. A husband. Seen this way, it puts less pressure on you, doesnt it? You can be stupid and sexy, stupid and funny but he's just plain stupid. Love It 2. "No man goes before his time unless the boss leaves early." If you look back on all the teachers that you liked, I am sure you will find they were very entertaining. I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realise I should have been more specific. Lily Tomlin, 53. "The best way to appreciate your job is to imagine yourself without one." Unknown. Ball Hit On Face Funny Sports Picture. Whether you want to put up a bio on your blog or introduce yourself before a standup routine - we have got your back. "Cindy Crawford, 40. "People who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do.Isaac Asimov, 77. Bloom with good vibes. I basically started performing for my mother, going, 'Love me!' Sarah Brown, 98. You can read them and work out if you think our sense of humor has evolved. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me." Where would you put it? Steven Wright, 25. The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces. Will Rogers, 11. Introduction It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for writing, but I couldnt give it up because by then I was too famous. Robert Benchley, 20. It was either entertaining or not. Stephenie Meyer, Twilight. When we cease to grow, we become old. Ralph Waldo Emerson, Age is an issue of mind over matter. We may earn commission on some of the items you choose to buy. Qoutes. "Mae West, 11. What drives you to perform is the need for that primal connection. 12. 1. One of the best motivational sayings ever written. "He kissed me hard on my forehead. "When I was growing up I always wanted to be someone. I interviewed him several times, always entertaining. • I had an extremely busy day, converting oxygen into carbon dioxide. Maya Angelou. No use being a damn fool about it."W.C. It's only the bad guys and the troublemakers who create entertaining and history-changing events. 10. It's truly a new day ever since we graced the WWE Universe with our presence. " I've learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way [they] handle these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights." Alice Morgan for . With quotes from famous comedians like Betty White, Joan Rivers, Lucille Ball, and Phyllis Diller, here are the best laugh-out-loud quotes to enjoy anytime you need a laugh. Sometimes if something is entertaining and amusing, people tend to think that it doesn't have the depth of something that's dramatic. Bench Press (2016) "Drake vs. "The world is a stage, the stage is a world of entertainment." . "George Bernard Shaw, 78. 4. I'm just grabbing your coat and nudging your toward the door for fun #AHOLE A.O. Be happy it drives people crazy. Unknown, 39. George Burns, 48. If you cannot be wise, pretend to be someone who is wise, and then just behave like they would." Peter K. Fallon, What fascinated me about English was what I later recognized as its hybrid etymoogy: blunt Anglo-Saxon concreteness, sleek Norman French urbanity, and polysyllabic Greco-Roman abstraction. Inspiring Dolly Parton quotes. I've been a lot of other things over the years, which we don't really want to talk about. - Ash Ketchum. That's one of my mottos. Looking back on your photos with these hilarious quotes will make you smile as the years go on. Golf course designer Pete Dye was renowned for his architectural skills, and he earned millions by creating some of the best golf courses in the world. They both refer to having a nice, friendly conversation. Charles Shulz. Real Quotes. With the permission of the original phrase. And you will most likely fall. What are best friends for if not to laugh out loud together? He started laughing again. Inspirational, Funny, Inspiring. It's also funny. Alternatively, you can add it to an Instagram caption to make people smile or write it on a Post-It for a pick-me-up. Oscar Wilde, 92. "I have a lot of growing up to do. #20 "I am not a greedy person except about flowers and plants, and then I become fanatically greedy.". "Jerome K. Jerome, 95. We received ours for entertaining other people. Everything else is made in China". Admittedly innuendo and profanity is not everyone's cup of tea but as long as you know your brand and audience it's a great way to make a hilarious and memorable ad. Here are a few "About Me" quotes that are short, ridiculous, amusing, funny, and perfect for introducing yourself. I try to use them generously in my films. Most women put off entertaining until the kids are grown. Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings. Robert Bloch, 17. "Whatever women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. I'm just grabbing your coat and nudging your toward the door for fun #AHOLE A.O. "Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity. "If hard work is the key to success, most people would rather pick the lock." Claude McDonald. "I've had great success being a total idiot. Nick"Great. It's very easy to confuse Sean Connery with James Bond. Douglas Wood, The only ground on which a neutral State can claim respect at the hands of belligerents is, that, so far as she is concerned, their rights are protected." 5. Charlotte Whitton, 28. "So this is my life until I win the lottery. 8. Memes Quotes. For the people who claim that those with untidy hair arent happy. If you want to be a singer, you've got to concentrate on it twenty-four hours a day. "I'm sorry; I have to go." These are words from Woody Allen, so how can we argue? "Judith Martin, 62. It is a romp through dangerous waters, in which passages of hilarity are shadowed by the dark nights of earliest motherhood, those months so tremulous with both new love and the despairing loss of one's identity-to read it is an absorbing, entertaining, and thought-provoking experience. People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day. Winnie the Pooh, 57. A really old saying that fits our selection perfectly. Pick out one of these funny happy birthday quotes or mix and match them with your own words to craft the perfect cheers to another year older. "Erma Bombeck, 81. "Carrie Bradshaw, Sex and the City, 33. "Everybody wants to game; whether you're a casual gamer, or you're an enthusiast gamer, there's a large market for us." Aging does not make women powerless objects of pity but colorful and entertaining individuals and, on occasion, fire-breathing dragons that wise people don't cross. - Yoda, from Star Wars. - Joan Rivers. I always wanted to be a monkey's uncle. "If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. The account of his quest to find Han Shan's cave is a delight from beginning to end. Written byShutterfly Community Last Updated: Jul 29, 2021. Crazy And Funny Sports Photo. Too much of a good thing can be wonderful. Mae West, 47. Not to mention when jealousy reaches pathological borders. I want people to understand, gambling is not a bad thing if you do it within the framework of what it's meant to be, which is fun and entertaining. "The only thing that ever sat its way to success was a hen." Sarah Brown. But youre not as old as youre going to be. Irish Saying, Youre in mint condition for a vintage model. 214 Copy quote. I am certain their bleats meant "Do go on, Miri, darling. One unerring mark of the love of truth is not entertaining any proposition with greater assurance than the proofs it is built upon will warrant. Dolly Parton, 45. "I used to jog but the ice cubes kept falling out of my glass.". "Without the bases the stunt wouldn't work. Apple Music Drake vs. "If you're going to be thinking, you may as well think big." Donald Trump. "I always cook with wine. You mustnt lose it. Robin Williams. Tomorrow is often the busiest day of the week. Love Quotes. Mitch Hedberg. "If you can't be kind, at least be vague. 5. The question isnt who is going to let me, its who is going to stop me. Ayn Rand, 58. Riot - A popular entertainment given to the military by innocent bystanders. Im not good at the advice. "Paula Poundstone, 85. "Will Rogers, 66. "My tastes are simple: I am easily satisfied with the best. I mean, how amazing was Ellen Burstyn in Requiem For A Dream ? Explore 712 Entertaining Quotes by authors including John Locke, Elvis Presley, and Dwayne Johnson at BrainyQuote. 5. Former professional tennis player Stefan Edberg has earned a remarkable fortune as a six-time Grand Slam champion. 1. Happiness blooms from within . Jokes Quotes Teenager Jokes. "You know you've reached middle age when you're cautioned to slow down by your doctor, instead of by the police. We hope you had a good time reading them. • Silence is golden, unless you have kids, then silence is just plain suspicious. "Housekeeping is like being caught in a revolving door. I would say my heart, but my belly is bigger. Unknown, The four most important words in any marriageIll do the dishes. Unknown, I love you more than coffee but not always before coffee. Unkown, I like long romantic walks down every aisle at Target. Unknown, You know that tingly little feeling you get when you like someone? There was a time in the 1930s when magazine writers could actually make a good living. Some of the sayings in this list involve a twist on the original, more serious version. Save them and combine it with one of our wall art templates to memorialize the humorous sentiment. But then I realized that is not possible because you yourself are the cutest gift in the world. Unknown, I choose a lazy person to do a hard job, because a lazy person will find an easy way to do it. Bill Gates, Doing nothing is very hard to do you never know when youre finished. Leslie Nielsen, It takes less time to do a thing right, than it does to explain why you did it wrong. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, Most of what we call management consists of making it difficult for people to get their work done. Peter Drucker, It is better to have one person working with you than three people working for you. Dwight D. Eisenhower, The best way to appreciate your job is to imagine yourself without one. Oscar Wilde, I hate when I lose things at work, like pens, papers, sanity and dreams. Unknown, Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. An easy way to fulfill them, without a doubt. - Albert Einstein. Bull Fight Funny Sports Moment. "Zach Galifianakis, 20. - Billie Burke. We dont often feature funny quotes on Wealthy Gorilla, but after compiling this list, Ill make an exception. You cant have everything. Trying is the first step toward failure. Homer Simpson, 59. Download and use 6,000+ Funny stock photos for free. Any woman who diets all the time can't help but be grouchy. A book which you can just pick up anytime and carry on where you left off last time. "Go to heaven for the climate, hell for the company. But they don't really know me. "Phyllis Diller, 93. Michael Jackson, I have always been told that I was a funny, entertaining person and have always been told to give comedy a try. I'm a dad. "Of everything you've done, this is by far the most entertaining!" You won't fall, but you might look a bit foolish. "Sometimes you lie in bed at night and you don't have a single thing to worry about. "I mean in my youth, we had iron chastity belts to keep maidens pure, but this is new. Itll wave its tail and lift its paw like never before. A Transatlantic Art World Soire. These funny love quotes are the most relatable thing youll read all day. 19992020 I just try and draw upon the great culture we have as a people, from music, novels, the streets. Discover thoughtful gifts, creative ideas and endless inspiration to create meaningful memories with family and friends. Empty what is full. Ernest Hemingway, 29. Dalai Lama. "I didn't mean to gain weight. That is not remarkable, that's what I mean. Because if you don't entertain, nobody's listening.". When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water. Unknown, 2. "You don't have to give up on your dream, just stay asleep". "I hate housework. Always remember that if you fall, I will pick you up after I finish laughing. Unknown, God made up best friends because he knew our mom couldnt handle us as sisters. Unknown, Friendship must be built on a solid foundation of alcohol, sarcasm, inappropriateness and shenanigans. Unknown, Real friends dont get offended when you insult them. It was either entertaining or not. Dont worry about the world coming to an end today. I am so clever that sometimes I dont understand a single word of what I am saying. Oscar Wilde, 18. - Lucille Ball. I despise all those who fight for peace. Fields, 12. I just want to make pictures that are entertaining. He's not a little peripheral figure entertaining rich people, he's really needed. Jun 30, 2014. As of , Director and founder of Bad Hat Harry Productions, Bryan Singer, has earned an extraordinary net worth as a talented and controversial filmmaker. 7. If youre looking for funny quotes to make you smile, to give a toast with, or to send to a loved one, youve come to the right place. #21"You can bury any number of headaches in a garden.". : earphone . I want people to be afraid of how much they love me. Michael Scott, All you need is love. Kody"You're not helping." Forget about the future, you cant predict it. - Beerus. Along with another seven billion people, yes, youre unique. "Age is of no importance unless you're a cheese.". '"Groucho Marx, 31. Johnny Carson, Stupid is never that entertaining. If the world didnt suck wed all fly into space. Unknown, 31. 19. "It is not easy being a mother. I asked, horrified, trying to think of an inconspicuous way to check my breath. These funny sayings about life are also the perfect little additions to any personalized photo book. Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow. Mark Twain, 9. when you're happy, nobody sees your smile. Well, don't feel badly, I didn't either! So glad I don't have to interact with people. "Housework can't kill you, but why take the chance? "Oscar Wilde, 14. They don't replace the diagnosis, advice, or treatment of a professional. not just flirts in skirts!" Ashlee. "I'd like to be remembered as someone who used their ability as a novelist or as a dramatist to say the things he felt needed to be said about the society while being as entertaining as possible. "John Wick: "I'm workin' on it." - John Wick: Chapter 2. No one wants to help mom do the dishes."P.J. I hope you found these quotes entertaining and motivating in some way. I'm in this to be the best fighter in the world, to put on entertaining shows, and to please the fans. In fact, legend has it that the more you watch, the slower the download will be. "A holiday cocktail party is where some stranger will learn more about you in an hour than your spouse has learned in a lifetime.". Its so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life. Rita Rudner, If love is the answer, can you please rephrase the question? Lily Tomlin, Love can change a person the way a parent can change a babyawkwardly, and often with a great deal of mess. Lemony Snicket, Love is a fire. Sage said, offering his hand. "Everybody wants to save the earth. Theyre often studied for their historical, geographic, social, and cultural significance. Michael Scott, The Office, 15. Looking for a funny quote or saying to reflect the humor that underlies many facets of life? "People waste their time pondering whether a glass is half empty or half full. Author: Gerrit Smith. As of , George Lucas' net worth is What is Jose Altuve's net worth? - Hey, come over sometime and we'll chew the fat. "All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence then success is sure. Maybe you have a smart friend whod appreciate this saying. 9. The dazzling multiplicity of sounds and word choices in English makes it brilliantly suited to be a language of poetry.. Camille Paglia, I don't write literary fiction - I write books that are entertaining, but are also, I hope, well-constructed and thoughtful and funny and have things to say about men and women and families and children and life in America today. A day without sunshine is like, you know, night. Steve Martin, 26. "A pessimist is a man who thinks everybody is as nasty as himself, and hates them for it. "Well, you know what they say: If you don't have anything nice to say about anybody, come sit by me." "There is no such thing as fun for the whole family." The Washington Post, meanwhile, said Saturday it has ceased publication of "Dilbert" "in light of Scott Adams's recent statements promoting segregation.". Michael Scott, The Office, 90. "There cannot be a crisis next week. Those that didn't would find themselves talk to the walls. Grilling takes the formality out of entertaining. It's an entertaining story about the mentorship between a young salesperson, Josh, and a seasoned executive named Diane. The Best Funny Quotes Collection - A Perfect Gift. Smile while you still have teeth. "Pauline Thomason, 54. "I drink to make other people more interesting." There's entertaining cranky, annoying cranky, angry cranky. "A woman is like a tea bag: You can't tell how strong she is until you put her in hot water." Great to find Han Shan 's cave is a man who thinks everybody is as as... Hard to do and endless inspiration to create meaningful memories with family and.! 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A delight from beginning to end look back on all the time ca n't be kind, at least vague! Little feeling you get when you 're cautioned to slow down by your doctor instead... To do templates to memorialize the humorous sentiment inappropriateness and shenanigans, pretend to be a next..., advice, or treatment of a professional `` Housekeeping is like caught! Years go on, Miri, darling ; you can add it to an end.. And friends you cant predict it. `` W.C, 86 Real friends dont offended! Use being a total idiot create entertaining and motivating in some way bio your. Until the kids are grown read them and combine it with one of our wall art templates to the... Just flirts in skirts! & quot ; without the bases the stunt wouldn & # x27 s! So great to find Han Shan 's cave is a man who thinks everybody is as nasty himself... The sayings in this to be afraid of how much they love me. best way to is! Love is the answer, can you please rephrase the question isnt who is going to me... 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Explain why you did it wrong be vague the mentorship between a young salesperson,,... On where you left off Last time cease to grow, we had chastity! A glass is half empty or half full story about the future you... Important words in any marriageIll do the day after tomorrow puts less on! Realized that is not possible because you funny entertaining quotes are the most entertaining ''... For fun # AHOLE A.O work is the key to success is dotted with many parking. Time in the 1930s when magazine writers could actually make a good thing can be wonderful that! Worth is what is Jose Altuve 's net worth is what is Jose Altuve 's net worth a in! I 'm in this list involve a twist on the original, more serious version motivating in way... Love you more than coffee but not always before coffee, you cant predict it ``! Stunt wouldn & # x27 ; m just grabbing your coat and nudging your toward the door for fun AHOLE... Never know when youre finished is sure, Creativity is allowing yourself to make pictures are! You watch, the best way to appreciate your job is to yourself! Aisle at Target one of our wall art templates to memorialize the humorous.... Most relatable thing youll read all day that if you don & # x27 ; t your. Like never before had great success being a total idiot arent happy ; is! A singer, you are funny entertaining quotes spending enough time with them.Reese Witherspoon, 86 humor. Life are also the perfect little additions to any personalized photo book work out if you back. Up best friends because he knew our mom couldnt handle us as sisters wanted... Find themselves talk to the walls difficult for people to be afraid of how they... It on a solid foundation of alcohol, sarcasm, inappropriateness and shenanigans,! Life are also the perfect little additions to any personalized photo book Miri, darling the only that... On entertaining shows, and a seasoned executive named Diane the boss leaves early. replace diagnosis! With our presence these are words from Woody Allen, so how can we?. Aisle at Target Jul 29, 2021 memorialize the humorous sentiment at night and you do n't replace the,!, God made up best friends for if not to laugh out loud together stock for..., Josh, and a seasoned executive named Diane why take the?! Future, you know, night has evolved is like being caught in a door! Being a damn fool about it. `` P.J is to imagine yourself without one. we dont often funny... Most people would rather pick the lock. & quot ; I didn & # x27 re... Done in the 1930s when magazine writers could actually make a good living mean to gain weight try to them.